The Crush House review: 1999’s hottest reality TV simulator

The Crush House Score Details Pros

Clever reality TV premise
Sharp social satire
Hilarious writing
Ingenious audience puzzling

Cons

Interchangeable characters
Limited simulation
Some disjointed gameplay hooks

Oh my God, did you catch the season finale of The Crush House? I totally did not expect Milo and Emile to hook up, but I’m here for it! I need to check their Instagrams to figure out if they’re still dating now. I just love that Gunther ended up alone, though. He’s such a freak. And Joyumi’s karaoke performance? So. Awkward. Who acts like that!?

If you’ve ever watched a reality TV show, you’re probably all too familiar with this kind of conversation. While the format became a phenomenon in the 2000s thanks to shows like Joe Millionaire and Survivor, it’s grown into an empire in the age of streaming services. Platforms like Netflix have capitalized on the sick appeal of reality TV by putting out trashy shows that raise the bar for what’s even ethical. It’s an infectious spectator sport that has a way of turning civilized people into proud brats.

WithThe Crush House, developer Nerial explores that dynamic in its unique reality TV simulator. Players aren’t just voyeurs who hate watching a slimy reality show; they need to satisfy those very people’s overbearing demands as the show’s sole cameraperson. It’s an ingenious concept delivered through hysterical writing and a one-of-a-kind first-person puzzle system. As sharp as it is, however, The Crush House’s limitations and at times disjointed gameplay show why it’s so difficult to truly replicate the complex appeal of trash TV.

1999’s hottest simulation

In The Crush House, players take on the role of the sole producer on 1999’s hottest reality TV show. It’s your typical slice of slop: four hot strangers spend a week together in a Malibu mansion complete with a pool (there’s always a pool!). The goal is to film all the drama as it unfolds, selectively recording the simulated show from a first-person