Helldivers 2 players are closing in on their first "permanent" win in the bug war, so surely nothing will go horribly wrong when game master Joel presses a big red button

Good job, recruits. Helldivers 2 players have descended on four "high-priority" planets to deploy a grid of Termicide dispensers that should shut down the local bug population for good, and the latest report from developer Arrowhead indicates the community is about to "permanently contain bugs."

"With Termicide dispersion towers now installed across the barrier planets, the Helldivers have begun operations to fully operate the Terminid Control System," a full-fat news broadcast from the Helldivers 2 Twitter declares. "The Termicide is proving extremely effective, with experts saying the benefits to the local ecology far outweigh the loss of some native species." 

You hear that? The Agent Orange cockroach spray currently fumigating entire planets is a good thing! Local ecology be damned; they should embrace democracy and die proud like the rest of us. Still not convinced? Well, consider this, you skeptical monster: "After the break, a child with terminal radiation poisoning gets a surprise visit from their greatest hero." That hero appears to be freeze-dried Helldiver #27882970. Come on, kid. Aim higher. 

Breaking: Helldivers To Permanently Contain Bugs#StrohmannNews pic.twitter.com/QLRQbtQxovMarch 13, 2024

What does this mean for the warfront? Well, from the phrasing around this TCS campaign, coupled with the tone of this news cast, it appears that Helldivers 2 is actually nearing a serious milestone in its forever war. Will we actually rid this sector of bugs? Like, for real? Maybe! But I'm not celebrating just yet. I can't put my finger on it, but there's something suspicious about this broadcast. More importantly, Helldivers 2 game master Joel is too crafty to let the TCS go off without a hitch. 

If we're lucky, the aftermath of this battle may see the release of new planets to replace the ones we've ticked off the conquest list. Today's news cast does notably specify that "a newly identified solar system may have up to three suitable planets for colonization,"